Warrior Stories Book - Holiday fundraising

[And]

Hi, 

They closed down the veterans food back in Calgary, CA, and are bickering over the reopening of the new one. I've had an idea for a while and I'd like to knowif you guys can help. I wanted to put together a book on Warrior Life. Basically a bunch of stories Veterans can relate to on their lives. War stories, family stories, poems, artwork maybe etc. Half the proceeds can go to the reopening. Hopefully its a lot. And It can be donated with a list of priorities on how to make the new one better and more efficient. So funds get distributed properly. That list could be made publicly available. To ensure everyone knows it. 

I'd like to know if you think its a good idea and if you can help me publish one. It can be short, if lots of people contribute it can be put together fast I think. I don't know, I've never done it before. But I think, its a good idea to bring up. We can include some of Jocko's speeches. I think it can be healing too. Some times you just need something to get through the rough patch. Plus I think its a good think for Veterans to know that civilians do care about this. I'm 100% civilian. Too often people end up isolating, that's not ok with me. 

I want to do something to help. What do you think?

Thanks. 

[And]

It could be made into a series as well if it goes well. It can be a way for veterans to reconnect with each other and the larger community. There are ways to keep it going and expand on the idea going forward. It can have a variety of stories so there's something for everyone to relate to. Books have always helped me. They're private. And they're "safe". For anyone dealing with PTSD, its something they can enjoy just on their own. No one else to worry about. If they feel like isolating, this is an activity they can do even in isolation. You can connect to someone, without worrying about the potential negative effect of PTSD in that moment. It can help relax.

And its getting bloody cold over here and they're still discussing it so I think it might be a good idea to provide some assistance.

[And]

I watched a mall full of people stop and pay their respects when they played the song on remembrance day. Everyone DOES care. They're just not being told how to show that they care. And the constant arguing and discussing of proper management and setup of veterans resources are not helping anyone provide support. No one wants to contribute and NOT know that their contribution is making a difference and I personally hate watching people suffer during "transitions".

I saw a guy get thrown out of a pub for soliciting the other day. He was trying to sell stuff and saying that some of the proceeds go to veterans (on Remembrance day). Apparently he was just telling ppl sob stories. I don't know, he seemed genuine to me. Basically, The impulse to show we care is there but the action is lacking. And action needs to be organized and have some authenticity to it. It can't just be one guy with some pamphlets. They can't tell the difference bw the ones doing actual work and the ones that are just passing along sob stories. We don't know if he's legit, where the money is going, etc.

I can usually tell the difference. Most people can't. They don't pay attention, they don't know how to contribute and its too small of an amount to actually make that much of an impact. I know everyone is focused on the arguments and there should be a debate if there was mismanagement. But they've been talking about it for years now and seem no closer to a solution. The burden always falls on the weakest. Not everyone has years to waste talking. I am not a veteran but I can sell almost anything, I'm very good at it actually. If I set up a small booth in the mall around Christmas it will sell. If its done in collaboration maybe it will switch everyone's focus away from all the negativity right now. Its a start. Its a bit of good news when all we've had is bad news for a while. You guys talked about AB on here before, it wouldn't be that much of a stretch.

Some times hope is all you have. Some times knowing that something is moving, anything at all, makes all the difference. It would be a good way for people who can afford it to contribute and provide a connection and a feeling of belonging to those who may not have anything or anyone else at the moment. I'm not going to get anything published on my own and I don't feel like I really belong in this conversation on my own to be honest. I just know what its like to have nothing. The specifics are not set in stone, if you see problems they can be worked around. I just think it might be a good idea to do something like this. There's too much pettiness going around right now. I feel like doing something different. Someone has to. And i have nothing better than THIS to do.

Everyone does care, they're just not sure how to show it. Its very much closed off, like we shouldn't get involved. So no one does. But I'm tired of all these ideas that its not our problem to contribute to. Why not? They fought for us. Why isn't it our problem? Especially when no one else seems to give much of a damn anyway. I think this weakens our society. I think both veterans and troops would feel better if they knew people do care and are willing to go an extra mile and do something about it. Have I mentioned I'm good at relating to people and definitely can't think of anything else I'd rather do at the moment?

Thanks. Someone reply with some enthusiasm and idea of how to start to pull this off please . Mall full of people, everyone stopped at once, everyone. That is a little inspiring. Its almost like when they forget to argue about dumb stuff they remember they know how to be nice too. That's something.

["Sock Fairy"]

Hi again, still me, just talking to myself ... I checked and they definitely accept cheques. In retrospect, I think it would be a bad idea for me to make "suggestions", which is why I firmly believe it would be a much better idea for the suggestions to come from say...other vets .

I really can't think of a single good reason to have financing issues right now. None. I'm not saying push a ton of funds into it and start giving everyone the impression we're up-ing the military effort, I'm just saying don't mess it up, bc I mean there's enough crap going around in the world right now. No one needs more. If that one oddball neighbour in the neighbourhood decided to go full retard and start having crazy gun parties with creepy friends I probably wouldn't go around telling them all that I have a broken lock and can't seem to be able to fix it. And btw there's no alarm system. And my back door is completely off the hinges and I can't afford to fix it. You know, bc that's probably a bad idea. Its just what most rational people would think... so I feel its a good time to maybe go a little out of our way to help out. Its an attitude thing. And before anyone asks, I did actually try to encourage people to give to both hurricane relief in the US and this kind of initiative up north, and the feedback so far was "meh, no, I don't think so, you don't have to, no one does" blah, blah, blah - we're lazy and ignorant. And that was from the top of the "command chain". I think that kind of attitude is corrosive. And it bugs me and I don't like it and well...here I am again!

Also, on a completely different note, I was almost homeless last year around the same time this year and this blog helped me go to sleep more nights then I should probably say and I need to do something about this.

This is the only program that got suddenly and inexplicably cut ("we have some ideas but we cannot share them with you" but there was no official reason, no) so I feel that it really needs attention. Other social programs are really taking off so I think they're ok there.

In case, all else fails, there's always the option to go do in-person deliveries. I already convinced my work to let me do one for socks but I'm the only one who participated so I have like... 4 socks. They're good, don't get me wrong. They're "immortal" socks from Red Head, which I highly recommend btw, bc they can replace them all without a receipt if they wear them out. So its something permanent and feet are important. But, its not nearly enough obviously. I need a lot more.

So if all else fails I can just do deliveries. I can buy out all the emergency blankets, socks and canned food dollar store carries ! And then move on the outdoors shampoo/soap and camping showers. They're really not that expensive. Its definitely doable. I can keep track of the number of homeless vets too. And assuming all that is taken care of we can move on to prepaid phones so they have a way to communicate. The super cheap walmart kind so no one wants to steal them or just prepaid phone cards which they can use with a public phone if the actual phone is a bad idea.

It would be like a "supplies/ first aid drop off", in the movies. I can make it cool. If I can get the word out and more people get involved it can be awesome!

I'm not suggesting anything anyone else can't do. I just think its better if its a structured effort.

Plus, I don't think anyone's actually seen a random person get involved - just a feeling. But they'll get used to me. I'm nice, I smile a lot. I have a psyc background so I can adapt to ptsd stuff if I run into it. The vet at the counter had it, and we got along great. I have a feeling we'll get along even better if I keep showing up with deliveries. Everyone can get involved!

Anyone feel like contributing?

I could start a you-tube series called "sock fairy", and see if I can go viral . Maybe that will work better then sarcasm to motivate people.

Hehe, I can branch out into a line of shirts that say "may the size of your *rocks* forever match the size of your heart - Happy Holidays!" or "Giveth to the sock fairy and your wallet shall be blessed, be a Scrooge and your *rocks* may fall off", and one with a super hot guy in uniform for the ladies -he doesn't need to say anything, he's motivational just by being there, lol! I can keep going, really. I'll find the right note to strike between funny/cheeky, motivational and respectful.

A picture of a fairy with a cane chasing/spanking a scrooge-like character while saying "donate!" perhaps? LOL...oh, the looks on peoples faces, that would be hilarious. Laughter is the best medicine after-all and I'm great at keeping my sense of humour no matter what !

Don't let my boundless enthusiasm fool you, I am quite broke. Its more like doing charity work in-spite of reality not because I have reached some great advanced level in my own life and can afford it now. Its more like, do it cuz I'm relating more to the homeless people then the ones with all the cool Instagram followers. No, this is not 100% recent, i always had a weak spot there, but it just really flared up in the last couple years like I said. Its a positive direction in which to channel my life frustrations at the moment, so I don't call anyone stupid out-loud, and when they throw out resumes from people desperate for a job I don't start swearing, out-loud. So, I gave myself a mission instead ! #sockFairy #grubFairy

["sock fairy"]

that angry face was supposed to be a grinning face...sorry

and weak spot for people in need, not weak spot cuz I've always been almost homeless, THAT was definitely just a freak series of events last year. Its better now. I am not currently homeless. Just making that clear.

[sock fairy]

Totally volunteering with vets groups...still working on the socks thing...but donated a bunch of food and stuff like that!

I think I found out what the problem was with the shelters to begin with...everyone is 100% BSing. What was the problem, why did they close, etc? But if you actually go there, they were in horrible disrepair, horribly organised (they looked like a hoarder was in change of them) and they can't even get their hours straight. Its definitely a good thing that they are getting reorganized.

[mynewunit]

I am glad you came to that realization. I have been intentionally quiet on this. Jocko has mentioned a few charities. And I know there are many more. A lot are pretty pathetic. I totally support lending you physical hands and time. Many organizations are just looking for your dollars.
Glad you did your part, and didn't just send some cash. Thank you.

[sock fairy]

Its incredibly stupid. But its 100% true. It was the right move to try to make improvements. And apparently they did reopen right away and actually the new ones are a lot better equipped. They wouldn't let me take pics. I don;t know why, that was annoying. And basically right now there's 2 that took up the role, they are 100% not connected to each other according to the note on the door and well, they're definitely doing stuff. I think I'd still pick the VFA over the other one right now just bc I think its MUCH better organised and while the same person from the old one (that closed) is in charge of the new one, apparently she doesn't plan to stay going forward.
I just don't know where all that money went that was supposed to be for veterans, bc its definitely not in the old buildings...or the staff...or the services. And its not the only building in disrepair either, i've been to a few now, they pretty much all kinda suck. The one downtown in the fancy office just wanted money. I think that's the "legacy one".

Also I might note - if you are a man in charge of such a program please, please either colour your hair properly or not at all. Just saying. Similar issue with the affordable housing program downtown, if you have time to get plastic surgery as a female, you should have time to update your office hours and understand clear questions. I don't understand why they keep hiring self absorbed dummies for these kinds of projects as the "face of the project". Where did the money go? I don't know, did you check the...face? LMAO! ROFL! seriously though...why? :/

[sock fairy]

HEY..can we nominate companies that might benefit from leadership training? > bc that would be VERY useful, and an excellent way to channel my frustration with some of the ones I encounter. Actually some of them are on your side of the pond. Bass Pro is actively encouraging people NOT to donate to causes and then firing them afterwards. For no reason. Like actually, no cause. The socks are still GREAT, still donate the socks. BUT, it could definitely benefit from different leadership. The first thing they do is tell you that they can't because they;re an AMERICAN company and only support AMERICAN causes. That's bullshit. If you try to donate to the AMERICAN causes, they discourage you. They just blatantly lie. I don;t know why. But they're definitely doing it. And its not the only one. Most of the american based ones do the same thing. Oh no, we can't possibly put out a jar to support (veterans, women, abused kids, etc.) because HQ doesn't want us to. Talk to HQ: "uhm...yea, we never said that, they lied to you." And they have all have inventory issues, website issues, the works. Bc bad leadership tends to affect EVERY part of the business believe it or not.

Its very difficult to raise these issues from within. Most of the times you will just get fired. They don't need a reason, they just get rid of you. You didn't "fit in". No one cares, no one wonders, no one asks questions. But in the mean time, all the staff perpetuate the idea that its just an american company problem. And im willing to bet on the US side they are doing the same. Its not, they're just being run by really incompetent leaders. They are really really dumb and malicious. Im developing trust issues. They seriously come up to you and encourage you to do stupid shit and then fire you if you don't. Its messed up. I saw people/customers go up and ask if they have veterans programs/ donations etc. and THAT was the answer. No its an american company and they just want us to focus on american causes. They I went in and said I'd like to donate to the American causes, and they said no, you really shouldn't, you can't claim it on the tax forms, no one does, etc. They're discouraging actively people with more of a community spirit, who are trying to ignore the BS going on politically right now and just focus on doing some good. Very bad leadership!

[sock]

OH, and I almost forgot, some of the people currently claiming to be helping out causes are seriously not right in the head: saw a restaurant advocate for donating to women's shelters - making "baskets" same as they do for the veterans programs which really caught my eye - while also having and I kid not - an entire meeting room and part of the bar room full of pics of naked girls. The table says "let's help women feel cherished this holiday season"...the wall above it, random naked woman...the room in the back, FULL, FULL of pics of naked girls. All around the walls. Now the actual charity box was being done by a different brewery, BUT how do you miss that? Its just the hypocracy that bothers me. AND this right across from a highschool too. How much does anyone want to bet the bartenders turn a blind eye to anything funny being placed in girls drinks? fml.

Its not all of them or anything but just that room was a little shocking. Over a dozen art/photographs of this shit...all of them just naked women in various positions. No other piece of art. Nothing else. Just that.

I want you to imagine walking into a room like that in an establishment run by women, advocating for boys clubs. And you let me know if the gut says "yea, nothing suspicious here at ALL." I'd have a hundred red flags pop in my head at once and warn every single guy I can find. Seriously, just random dudes on the street. Just to feel better that I did something.

[sock]

quick follow up: how come the food bank reopened but they didn't tell anyone about it? Its bugging me, a lot. I really thought everyone knew. But the main guy I was talking to before, who is definitely a vet, didn't know. I have to go back and tell him cuz its stupid for him not to know and I feel like crap doing it, even though its not my fault. Its just...why didn't they tell ppl? They hid it.

And how are they going to get lots of help if they don't let ppl know? what's the deal? there's a warehouse of stuff that needs to be distributed...who's going to do it? what is this need to lie and hide...why can't you just be upfront about what's going on?

How many ppl do u honestly think have entire days to dedicate to sorting through cans for a charity most have no idea still exits, let alone how to find it. Why can't I tell ppl? Its a charity not a magic hole.

Let me just put this simply: more hands, do more work. I get this isn't making anyone "look good", but they made themselves look bad enough, i'm just reporting my frustration.

[sad socky]

ok, so I'm not exactly making progress. Something's up with the person in charge of the New re-opened program-thingy. Basically, there are 2 now. One is the old one and the other is run by this random dude. Apparently there's feuding between them (yes, I do realise how stupid this sounds, but keep in mind its not my stupid, its situational stupid). Every time I show up I get dragged into their inner rivalry saga. I can't even bring a delivery without having to answer if I dared to try to help out at the other place. Personal opinion neither place is exactly going out of their way to get anything done. I can't say I feel inspired by either one. But the main place (the one with all the drama) is the same one that closed suddenly and without any real explanation. Last time I was there they gave me the impression that nothing's going on anymore bc it got warmer outside. Do vets no longer need to eat in warm weather...? I'm really working hard to keep the biting sarcasm in check. But im not sure why im bothering. They seem more keep on keeping ppl out then letting them help out. On top of that my job was NOT happy with my little food bank initiative. So basically I started with all the best intentions and all im getting is bs, drama, more bs...etc.

Why? And how do I fix it? Should I even bother fixing it? Why is no one else fixing it? And most importantly: how exactly does anyone expect veterans and the community to intermingle, and integrate when everyone is so dead set on chasing off any civilians/ volunteers who try to help?
I dealt with the dumb ppl at my job, I dealt w a LOT of dumb stuff recently, I'm tired of this random crap. They are more interested in their little turf wars then in helping out. List of things I cannot do:
1. know the schedule
2. go to vets events and help fundraise
3. go volunteer anywhere else where they might do that
4. tell ppl the location of the food bank
5. drop off stuff without getting interrogated
6. sign up to the mailing list, or any volunteer list
7. talk to ppl
8. ask why the other one closed down
9. tell ppl that the same person who ran the other food bank is running this one too
10. I could go on, i'll just stop though bc I'm not sure what the point is anymore.

Its like we're all supposed to play at being useful and actually accomplishing something and somehow I'm the only one that didn't get the memo that we're just pretending. I got the memo, I'm ignoring it. Willfully, ignoring it. As in on purpose. I have not actually seen a single can get delivered into the hands of a single vet. You know what might be nice to get more ppl involved. Let them see their efforts lead to something! So we're not all just blind, deaf, stupid cogs in the great machine of redundant beaurocracy.

So I can go to my dull work ppl and share the great fruits of my labour and get them to do more next year. How am I supposed to motivate with nothing to show for anything. I know no one gives a hoot and they're too lazy to even ask how it went (literally) - but I certainly cannot change that with a post it note that says - thanks, veterans food bank (a post it note - weeks, weeks of careful persuasion, 3 different managers and head office ---> post-it note). Bc: "well we don't want to just let ppl take the credit, especially if they didn't do that much." Yes, but I DID. And they were convinced to do anything at all, bc of that, and if nothing happens then next year, nothing will happen at all and instead of building upwards towards MORE donations, I just show up with the stupid post it (grudgingly given) and no one does anything next time. See the problem? I have nothing to reward the incremental progress and I wasted my energy and everyone is somehow mad at me now.

And, I might add, the answer to "why didn't you guys announce the reopening, I know vets that don;t know u reopened?" was: "Which ones?"/ (insert answer)/ "oh, well I don't know that one.".........why does that matter? are we only delivering food to the ones YOU know personally?

In the spirit of ownership, I accept the fact that most of my frustration comes from having expectations. If I could just accept that ppl naturally suck and be happy about it all my problems would go away. If i could just sit there and sort cans and not ask questions all my problems would go away. If it didn;t bother me that they're lieing through their teeth.... ok, im going extinct. I'm no longer compatible with the rest of humanity. Its fine, I don't really care, I'll be a perfectly happy last specimen, but endorsing this crap is just never happening. I'm accepting this as a limitation in my character. Now I just need a way around it....

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Except accept crap, endorse crap. I can't. It gives me rashes.

My opinion is that the more places there are to help out, the more veterans will get fed. This seems like a reasonable conclusion.

But this place was the main place and if I go to the other place I'm apparently banished.

[mynewunit]

You have learned the hardest part of charity. Who gets a cut and who gets the praise.
This is why most businesses are hesitant to start giving to a new to them charity. Some are effective some aren't. The worst is when you do give and the charity turns out to be so bad at their job that they loose their 501c3. Which means you just gave stuff to a friend.
I like your initiative. Trying to help. Next time start with the people then find the cause. There are great charities out there. They are generally found by the great people who work for them. Go find some of these people and then support them. Yes it might not be your ideal charity. Maybe it is for domestic violence, animals, or helping at risk families. You will be more effective if you don't have to change their culture to match yours.

Good luck. Enjoy your journey.